Isn’t that how the saying goes?
Men want the woman they marry to be a chef in the kitchen, a lady in the living room and a whore in the bedroom.
WTG on putting stress on a woman. Throw in the perfect mom, good salary earner, being thin and we are headed straight to Prozac.
It’s no wonder so many women feel as though they are just not coping. Look at that. When must we make time for ourselves? When we go grocery shopping alone? Gym to be thin for the husband and the rest of the judging world? The 2.3 minutes we get to bath alone before someone forgets that closed doors are meant for privacy?
I wonder if men even realizes this? I wonder if they know how much they expect of us?
May 20, 2008 at 12:10 pm
You know I can’t cook, I hardly go into the lounge but I like and enjoy my bedroom - and Dion in it. I will never be thin unless I get some serious illness and in the past Prozac made my insomnia worse…. my salary is okay I guess for what I do and since I have no qualification to speak off…. and I don’t think I will win any mom prizes.
I wonder sometimes how much of this expectation of perfection is our own doing, what society has dictated to men to ‘demand’ and the percentage of woman who ever reach it? I think very few… if not nobody.
We all just do the best we can. Sometimes we cook fabulously, we be very nice ladies generally and sometimes we even say fuck in the bedroom… but not all on one day!
Love you dahhhhhhhhling.
me
May 20, 2008 at 1:41 pm
I can answer that question for you!! NO WAY!!! They have NO IDEA how much pressure they put on us. Not that mine cares that I’m not skinny, but he does want me to cook and clean even though I work 40 hours a week and go to school (and raise his kids, and run errands, and do all of the grocery shopping, and laundry, and menu planning…). I’m sure you get the point. I do everything in this house and he sits back and wonders why I’m a raving lunatic that doesn’t have energy for sex more than once a week.
May 20, 2008 at 2:02 pm
I don’t know how you do it - you really are Supermom juggling everything - I really do take my hat off to you.
May 20, 2008 at 6:19 pm
Yeah, what Jenn said above and add to it my history of sexual abuse from my dad…I’m happy not to be medicated yet!
May 20, 2008 at 9:47 pm
I packed out laughing when you mentioned the bathroom door. WHAT DOES IT TAKE TO GET A DECENT 30MIN CANDLELIT BUBBLE BATH THESE DAYS!! OY VEY!! I hear you! This morning I couldn’t even go to the loo alone before Bubby came in took two steps towards me, then backed out closing the door saying, “Hmmm…smelly” I could hear my husband laughing his ass off down the passage as he was getting dressed for work.
May 21, 2008 at 1:31 am
“grocery shopping alone?” LOL thats me
i lock the bathroom door LOL
and no they probably dont
May 21, 2008 at 11:16 am
to be a whore in the bedroom is the easy part, its the chef and the lady that i struggle with
May 21, 2008 at 11:50 am
Hey Grilfriends
I have to get my share of this “Bitch about our men folk” pie… I agree with Wenchy that sometimes we bring it onto ourslves without even intending to. I remind him whenever it gets too much about adding “his’ value to our family. He pulls his socks up for 1.5 weeks and then falls back to his old habitual expectations. I’ll never be thin again but I wont be FAT either. I will be me and he will love me for me.
May 21, 2008 at 4:11 pm
You forgot engaging conversationalist. Sometimes days go by without Neen and I sitting down to talk. Marriage is hard wark, sometimes. But worth it.
May 21, 2008 at 6:36 pm
Luckily I’m getting out of a relationship where I never even got to be the whore in the bedroom but I had to do everything else. My new relationship involves lots of the bedroom and none of anything else. Maybe I finally got it right?
May 21, 2008 at 7:02 pm
Today was just the right day for me to read something like this.
I always feel like I have to be everybody for everyone. Just last night he blamed me for him standing me up because I didn’t call him earlier, before he fell asleep knowing he had made plans with me. So now I’m expected to be his secretary too?
Sheesh!
May 22, 2008 at 4:32 am
I think I’ve got it all down except for the “thin” part. LOL Hubby knows how good he’s got it and knows better than to EVER complain about my weight. That would be very, very bad for him.
May 23, 2008 at 5:17 am
I understand what you are saying but I did get lucky. My husband and I try to keep chores and things equal. We both work and and try to make as much time as we can for ourselves and eachother. I could see how easy it could be to loes yourself though. I really love your posts. Sorry I have not been blogging lately! I have been taping shows which I am excited about because I was able to post them on my blog YAY!! If you get a chance to check it out, then let me know what you think. The more feedback I get the better I can make the segments Also, your stories are great and my whole idea behind this show is for other moms to share real stories like you do. Anyway, I’d love to hear from you.
May 26, 2008 at 7:20 am
i don’t think they know what they expect- and honestly, i think its how they’re raised. i’m hoping damien will be a little more understanding one day when he’s a grown up.