Super Mom

Epilepsy

My epilepsy attacks seem to come in waves.  When they hit, it just keeps on coming.  Many.  Over and over.  Like a bad day on the sea.  Making me feel sea sick.

Lately I have been having too many attacks.  Normally one early in the morning just after waking up, making sure the rest of my day I will be fucked  feel tired and sometimes just a tad unsure of what is going on around me.  Not that I don’t know but I seem to need to force myself to think more clearly.  Kinda like having a hang-over.  You are okay, just not as sharp as a minora blade.

Last night at gym I actually felt so weak and …. can’t really explain the feeling … that I just left.  I went home and couldn’t wait to reach the bed and just lie there. 

I’m already on a high dosage anti-epilepsy medication.  I’m not sure if I want to increase it or not.  I’m under stress and that is a huge contributing factor.  I know that as soon as all those evil papers files around me has been completed and submitted I will start feeling less stressed and most probably have less attacks.  Hopefully none.

Just for interest sake.  When I have an attack I have one of two things happening.  Some feel as though an invisible hand has gotten hold of my brain and is just shaking it from side to side. I’m capable of having a conversation and acting completely normal.  No-one will realize that I’m actually having an attack. However I normally can’t recall what exactly was going on once the attack is over.  This leaves me tired and mostly with a headache and I feel as though I can’t speak normally (although I do)

Then I have one that I prefer lol I feel as though I’m floating up and everything is just down there.  I know what’s going on and I can recall everything after the attack.  I am normally tired after that too but not as badly as the first type.

Very interesting this epilepsy.  There is never a dull moment in my life. 😉

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5 responses

  1. ginaegg

    I think in all the time I’ve been stalking you reading your blog, I don’t think I remember reading before that you are an epileptic. I hope this season of attacks passes quickly for you! I can’t imagine feeling sea sick every day for days on end – wait, yes I can…if it’s anything like “all day morning sickness” then I really hate that you feel like that!!

    November 7, 2007 at 7:58 pm

  2. Wenchy

    I think that brain thing you describe is similar to when I did the Effexor withdrawal!

    November 7, 2007 at 8:07 pm

  3. my3boysandi

    Praying for you my friend

    November 7, 2007 at 10:07 pm

  4. I’m sure it makes you feel out of control. I hope you can get it safely under control soon. Thoughts & prayers!!!

    November 8, 2007 at 5:13 am

  5. SIL

    We all wish that we could somehow take away the attacks for you. Thinking of you.

    November 9, 2007 at 9:08 am

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