The start of a new year is always busy for me. But normally not emotional.
We have to get school supplies.
Go back to work.
Do the first day of school thing.
Celebrate Zander’s birthday.
I think this year was emotional for me since I am emotionally not in a good place. Zander went and grew up without my permission. Went to Grade 1 and turned 7 just like that.
7 has always been a big number for me. It’s as if the kids move from being my little boy, to being a boy. A child. A separate person. Exploring and experiencing things without me. Just moving on with growing up and being a child.
Quintus is in his final year of primary school. Just yesterday HE went to Grade 1.
Things are moving fast. Kids are growing up so quickly and it feels like I am being left behind. Not by them. I want them independent. With self confidence yet knowing I am here for them. Always.
It’s something else. I don’t know how to put my feelings into words.
Maybe when I have my work up to date. Or the kids are settled and back into routine.