Super Mom


What did you do?

What did you do when you turned 16?

Well, Jason spent his afternoon donating blood.


He has been wanting to donate blood ever since I was diagnosed with cancer.  However he was still too young and could only do so once he turned 16.  He wouldn’t wait one day longer and did it on his birthday.

You make me so proud, Jay.  Such a selfless act and in honour of me.

He received two gifts, since it was his first time.  On our way home Jason saw a homeless man and gave the scarf he received to him.

Thank you for being the awesome son you are.

Happy birthday.  I hope that life treats you well.  That you will have more smiles than tears.  That you will learn from your mistakes.  That you will always know that you are much loved.

Soos die son.


Birthdays are special

Happy 12th birthday Zander. I am so very proud of the person you are. You are compassionate beyond your age. You love so deeply. You have trust in people and see the good in everything. You have a sweet, pure heart. I hope that regardless what life throws at you, you will always choose to see the good.

I’m sorry for not being able to give you the best birthday ever. You deserve the best, every year. Maybe tomorrow we can have the Wimpy breakfast you are supposed to have on your birthday. Maybe I feel better tomorrow.

For now though, sorry that you had to walk into our room and see me sleeping most of your birthday. I found the photo on your phone and I wonder how many times did you walk in to check on me.

Happy birthday sweet boy.

Next year, I promise.

Was he supposed to grow up like that?

Tommie has always said that this is not exactly what he had in mind.  Zander wasn’t supposed to grow up.  He was supposed to stay our “little one”

Just like that though, our almost “laatlammetjie” is 10.

As in double digits.

As in a tween.

He was the smallest of our children.  Only 2,7 kg.  Barely a breath.  Yet he has such a huge role in all our lives.

He is much loved by everyone who meets him.

Happy birthday Zander.  Thank you for being that little boy we all needed but didn’t know that we did.


You are loved.


For the first time in 10 years, I celebrated my birthday at home.

Not at  Buffelspoort, where we have gone to the Sitrusfees for rugby Zander’s entire life.

This year, we didn’t have a little bulletjie rugby player.

It was very bitter sweet.

I did however, have a GREAT birthday. I was loved from the moment I woke up with a bear hug from my kids, till the moment I have to fight for a place in my bed at night.

Thank you to every single person who took the time to wish me a happy birthday.

Blessed to be a year older.  Blessed that I could spend it with those I love.

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Quintus turned 14 yesterday.  FOURTEEN!  Wasn’t he just a little redhead boy, too scared to go to Grade R?

When they say time flies, boet, they mean time flies. I have always said that I treasure every moment with my kids and I do.   Still, somehow, time slips through your fingers.

I clearly remember the day he was born. How I resigned that same day because the people from work wouldn’t stop calling me.

I remember his first birthday.  Him and his cousin having cake together, yet he hardly got his face dirty.

His second birthday ended with him being admitted in hospital with the rota virus.  We spent the next week there.

So I can go on, with every birthday feeling like just last week.

I sat there yesterday as he had breakfast with his friends and it hit me that in just four years time he will be 18.  He will a couple of months away from going to ‘varsity. Four years.  That is nothing.


Happy birthday Quintus.

I hope you take time to capture memories.  Even if you don’t have your camera with you.  Capture it in your mind.  Live the moment.

I love you endlessly.  I am proud to call you my son. 

You care so deeply and you aren’t scared to show that.  You are protective of your brothers even though some days they work on your nerves.

You are the best teenager I know.  You are balanced, with loving your rugby, doing well at school and your passion for music.

Some days I look at you and wonder why I couldn’t have been that self-confident as a teenager.

You amaze me.

Thank you for the hugs, kisses and coffee when I don’t expect it. Thank you for telling me you miss me.

Soos die son

Now you are eight



You have been waiting for this very day since the day after your last birthday.  You have told me what you want for months. You couldn’t wait to be eight.  Here you are little boy.  Eight years old.

Let me give you eight things I love most about you.  Do remember that I love you from your little toe to your bed-head hair in the mornings.  Every single little thing.

  1. I love that you call me Moeder.  Not Mamma like Jason or Mamsie like Quintus but Moeder.  Out of your very own.  Don’t know where you get it from, since I never refer to myself as your Moeder.
  2. I love that you wake up with a smile on your face every.single.morning.  I cannot think of one day that you have woken up even slightly down.  Your smile appears at the same time as you open your eyes.  I love that.
  3. I love that you never allow me to finish my coffee.  My little coffee-lover.
  4. I love how happy you are.  That you go with the flow. Even when I ask things that I know will upset most kids, you just say “Ja Moeder” and off you go. 
  5. I love that you love animals the way you do.  You adore animals.  You have a bond with animals unlike most people.  People love animals but there is something special in the way you love them.
  6. I love that you still sleep in bed with me.  I suppose at some stage you will sleep in your own bed but for now I love that warm little body next to mine.
  7. I love how you look up to your brothers.  Boetie Quintus and Boetie Jason.  Not just Quintus or Jason.  They are your hero’s.
  8. I love how you love rugby.  That you support the Sharks even though no-one else does.  That you love playing the game.  You play so hard even though for the past 3 years you were the little one on the team.

Happy birthday Zander.  I love you more than coffee. More than all the sand on the beach and like I always say, I have loved you before you loved me, so I win.

I never knew how much I wanted you until I held you in my arms.






Eleven years. Eleven things

When Lightning and Awesome struck, Jason was formed.

Your words. Not mine.
You are at such a good place within yourself. So self assured.

Since you are eleven today, here’s eleven things I love about you.

1.  Your intelligence. 
2.  Your sense of humour.  You are classic.
3.  Your love for tennis and the hours you put into it.
4.  The way you don’t mind being reserve player for the rugby team and never expect them to let you play.
5.  How hard you work at school.
6.  That you don’t let friends influence you.  You are your own person. You turned out to be so much stronger than I thought you would.
7.  Your love for your brothers even in times when you are working on each others nerves.
8.  That you can’t sleep without Quintus.  I love that about both of you.
9.  Your compassion for others.  Even bullies who don’t treat you right.  You know there must be something wrong in their lives.
10.  I love how you do things for me.  Buy me a chocolate when you run into the store for us. Make me a cup of coffee on a rough day. Breakfast on a Sunday.
11. Mostly I love that you are mine and that you want to be mine.

I adore you.  I am so proud to be your Mom.

Happy birthday Jay.


It’s you

It’s you who taught me how to be a Mom.

It’s you who taught me that being a Mom is way more important than my career. I never would have believed that until I looked into your gorgeous blue eyes.


It’s you who taught me to be more patient.  Love more.  Give more.  Be more.

Now it’s you that will teach me how to be the mom of a teenager.

I love you with all my heart.  I’m proud of you beyond words.  I hope that teenage years will treat you well.  That you will continue being the awesome son that you are.  The awesome and caring person you are.  The best big brother any child can ask for.

Happy 13th birthday Quintus.

Soos die son.


The start of a new year is always busy for me.  But normally not emotional.

We have to get school supplies.
School clothes.
Go back to work.
Do the first day of school thing.
Celebrate Zander’s birthday.

I think this year was emotional for me since I am emotionally not in a good place.  Zander went and grew up without my permission.  Went to Grade 1 and turned 7 just like that.

7 has always been a big number for me.  It’s as if the kids move from being my little boy,  to being a boy.  A child.  A separate person. Exploring and experiencing things without me.  Just moving on with growing up and being a child.

Quintus is in his final year of primary school.  Just yesterday HE went to Grade 1.

Things are moving fast.  Kids are growing up so quickly and it feels like I am being left behind.  Not by them.  I want them independent.  With self confidence yet knowing I am here for them.  Always.

It’s something else.  I don’t know how to put my feelings into words.

Maybe when I have my work up to date.  Or the kids are settled and back into routine. 

Birthday and ….

This morning I asked Zander what kind of part he wanted for his birthday. For once I want to order the cake early enough. With his birthday so early in the year, I normally wait until the last minute.
All of a sudden he got upset and wouldn’t talk to any of us. He wouldn’t tell me what’s wrong. I decided to just ignore it.

Later he came to me and asked me to go lie with him. That’s when he said he didn’t want a party at all. He didn’t want anybody at his party. I still couldn’t understand why.
Then it dawned on me….

We have told him many times that it will be Christmas, then his birthday and then he will go to “big school”. This is why he doesn’t want a birthday. He doesn’t want to go to school. He is not ready. Well he is but he doesn’t feel ready.

Poor boy 😦

Just a number

When I picked up Jason’s cake for his birthday party, the nine was put there in silver.  Different from the yellow and orange colour of the cake.  Almost as though it wanted to make a statement.  Grab my attention.  It did just that.  I stared at that number and just couldn’t believe that almost nine years ago my Jay was born. 

It feels weird to have his party a whole week before his birthday!  We won’t be home from Thursday though (he has a big rugby tournament all weekend).

A photo post of his party.  I’m so thankful my parents and awesome brother and SIL were there.  Thank you.

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Okay, so I think I might be stuffing up a birthday for the first time ever.

Quintus is turning 11 next Tuesday.  He said he didn’t want a party but would rather use the money for a big gift.  Very grown-up I thought (and it saved me a ton of planning and organizing!)

Then for the longest time I asked him what he wanted and he didn’t know.  I couldn’t just let him have a birthday and then get nothing.

So we organized for all of us to go watch the Blue Bulls play at Loftus tomorrow night.  We are also taking his best friend and another friend with.  We are staying over at a guesthouse opposite the stadium.  We even bought him a new Blue Bulls shirt.

Today … Jason kinda let the cat out of the bag (after Quintus begged him) and now he doesn’t seem happy at all.  He didn’t say it but I could see it on his face.

I understand that it is not just for him, since we are all going.  I can understand that it’s not a big present like he asked for.  It’s not a party. 

He is not ungrateful.  He is just not that type of child.  I just think he is disappointed.  That he expected more?

I’m feeling like it’s not enough now…..

Happy birthday Tommie!

Yesterday Tommie turned 41. FOURTY ONE.

That just sounds so old lol 

Blowing the candles on his “very big” cupcake Smile

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Starting on their impromptu gift for Tommie.

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The final product

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A whole handful

Yesterday Zander turned FIVE. 

Only five and already five at the same time.  I looked at him sleeping, moments before we woke him with a “happy birthday” and he seemed so big and so little at the same time.

He just wanted us to surprise him on his birthday.  Basically he wanted to wake up with his presents on my his bed and we have to wake him up, singing “Happy Birthday”

Well, we got up nice and early …. got everything ready quietly, sang happy birthday and he wouldn’t wake up!!! lol  He slept right through the first Happy Birthday, so we had to do a take two.

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We went to Wimpy for breakfast (a small tradition I have on their birthdays – yes even on school days)

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Got everything set up and ready for the party.  An hour before the party, it began to rain.  Summer birthday, with a waterslide / jumping castle.  Rain is not good.  Yet it worked out perfectly.  The party was two hours long and for those two hours, there was no right..  Before and after, it rained.  Perfect perfect timing.  Someone was helping me out there!

The friends arrived and they had such a great time.

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I could hardly get them off the jumping castle long enough, for Zander to blow out his candles and have cake!

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As always we let go of his birthday balloons after the party.

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I think he had a very happy, happy birthday.

The week ahead

The boys had their cousins visit this past weekend (since Thursday).  This put a stop on my school clothes shopping.  I now have two days left to do this.  That might sound like a lot but in a small town with only one shop to get school clothes, it’s not enough.  It’s kinda what I imagine   shopping on Black Friday must be like.  URGH   I also cannot stand the attitude of the staff and owner of the store.  Makes me anxious just thinking about it.

Then we have to actually get back into the school routine.  And with that I don’t really mean the boys.  I have been sleeping until 8 am every single morning since the school holidays started 6 weeks ago!  Sjoe, Wednesday is going to be hard on me lol

Friday, my baby big boy Zander turns FIVE!  That’s big!  A whole handful!  Even though my boys always end up having a great birthday, I tend to have serious anxiety about it.  I know just how important their birthdays are to them and I want it to be perfect.  This is the first time Zander will have a birthday party at home (normally it’s at school) and he is really looking forward to it.

Now when this week is over things go back to normal.

I wanna redo this birthday.   Is that possible?  It ranks right up there with any other bad day.

It was bad on almost every single level…right from finances, work, school, husband, health….the works.

There was some good (lunch with the folks, my brother and SIL …. visit from my other brother all the way from far away) but overall … it sucked.

Birthday gift list

See, my dear soul mate Wenchy does a birthday wish gift list every year.  I think it’s fabulous. No chance that she’ll end up with four pairs of ugle grey panties.

Every year I contemplate it but then by the time I think about it, my birthday is the very next day…… like this year again 🙂

The list would be great.  Being able to make that list and wish for one of those gifts.

Then as I left for Spar and Tommie asked me to buy a cupcake and candle for him to wake me up with tomorrow, I realized that a list won’t mean much. Not even if I print it out and put it up on the kitchen fridge lol

Especially when he asked me to buy a birthday card from him as well!!!

Happy birthday Ouboet

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Happy birthday to the BEST big brother.

“Ouboet, I love you like the sun.  You make me very proud.”


10 kids for 10 years

I know loud.  I have three sons with many friends.  I know loud.  Last night I was introduced to a whole new level.

These are all good boys.  I like them all very much.  Put them all together though and you have energy that can live roofs.  They were convinced there are ghosts and shouted at every opportunity.  Even our neighbour came over to ask if everything was okay!!!

They had loads of fun though.  I did try to calm them down with some activities but it didn’t last long.  They went to bed way too late and woke up way too early.  I have no voice from trying to speak over the noise.

It was all good.  As long as they walked away saying it was fun, I’m happy.

Playing rugby while waiting for all the friends to arrive

I had to laugh.  The boys told me that they would easily break the pinata with one hit….didn’t happen!!!

Watching from a distance

The loud friends

Happy birthday my dear son

Spraying each other’s hair

Cushion fight!

Writing on each other’s shirts

Little redhead  🙂

Finally calming down enough to watch a movie

Next week  he will be 10.  Wow.  Double digits.

It was your birthday

It was his birthday.  His choice not to take part in it.

Baby, you worry me so.

Happy birthday Jay-Jay.  I’m so thankful that I’m your mom. 

I love you so very very much.



People always say kids can be so cruel but kids can be so very sensitive too.  Like Wenchy’s Victoria on Saturday.

It was Wenchy’s birthday and we were celebrating at Mama Tembos.  A lot of fun.  At one stage I was standing outside with Tommie and her kids.  I stood next to this wooden African woman.

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Victoria looked at this and said that the woman looks like me…?  Kinda perplexed at this, I said she doesn’t really … she’s taller than me.  That’s true she says.  She’s also thinner than me, I say.  She walks up to me, pats me on my back and says with compassion:

“That’s okay.  That really doesn’t matter”



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Mama Tembo is pretty unique in that it is all African.  Drinking out of a glass bottle is not unheard of.






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When you get your meal, you also get this bowl.  Knifes and forks, sauces and a toilet roll.



Liam, Wenchy’s son, walks up to me all excited.  “Did you see we get free toilet paper!”  “Yes, I said … that’s cool hey” (joining him in his childlike joy).  Tiny silence and then in a soft voice “I think it’s for afterwards” 

Got to love kids!

I’m not going to write much about my amazing son who is turning 9 today.  The son who first turned me into a mother.  First one to call me “Mamma’”.

Today he is nine.  Nine more years and he is 18.  Nine more years before he will leave our home to hopefully go to ‘varsity and not become a doctor or an accountant or to become a professional rugby player.

I love this child more than is humanly possible.  My very own Dennis the Menace.

Here is how he has changed in the past 9 years.  All photos taken on his birthday every year.


My newborn baby boy. My son.


Dirty little one year old

A very sick 2 year old.  He was admitted to hospital on his birthday

A very sick 2 year old. He was admitted to hospital on his birthday


Clearly three


And then he was four


Very handsome 5 year old

My blue-eyed 6 year old

My blue-eyed 6 year old

After school on his 7th birthday

After school on his 7th birthday

My happy 8 year old

My happy 8 year old

Blowing out 9 candles.

Blowing out 9 candles.

Wow.  Today he is nine.

Too much on my mind

Thankfully he was in my office yesterday, at the right time.  Just as his mom phoned him to say that he could pick up the cakes.

It took  me a question fraction too long to realize that the cakes were for his birthday!

I so almost forgot his birthday.  SO almost.  Oh. my. word.  If it weren’t for that call, I would never have remembered.  It just goes to show how busy I really am.

Now though he thinks I’m the super-cute wife, who bought him a cell phone for his birthday. 

Happy birthday Sweetie.  Enjoy your last year of being in the thirties!!

Sleepless night

I couldn’t sleep last night.  So stressed about things not going smoothly today.

It a hectic day.  Today so many milestones.  My baby boy turns three. 


He also started preschool for the very first time.  JJ started Grade 1 today (and said I could leave as soon as he got to his desk lol).  Quintus started Grade 3.


I have 30 minutes before picking up everything for Zander’s party at school and setting up the tables there.  I hope my little one will be okay at school.  I’m especially worried about him asking to use the toilet.  He is such a little one at heart still.

I have MUCH to write.  I have a zillion photos to share and that obviously doesn’t include photos of the party!