Super Mom

Life in general

Whatsapp groups

When you have children, work, family and a life you will most probably have more than one whatsapp group on your cellphone.

I have for my children, some of my clients and their employees, hockey parents, Kyla’s hockey group, swim group, homeschool group etc.

Now, I don’t mind groups and I totally understand the importance and convenience of such groups.  This is why I create groups for directors and employees of companies that I need to be in contact with.

However, it can be frustrating!

Firstly.  We are beyond the days of mxit where you were limited to the amount of characters that you are allowed to use.  This is whatsapp.  You can type a book if you want to. (Please don’t)  So there is NO reason at all to use abbreviations that don’t exist.  Is it really that much quicker and if so what on earth do you do with the 15 seconds you just saved?  Please be considerate and take into account that some people actually attended school and now it takes them time to figure out what on earth you meant.  It’s almost like being back in school, where you created your own language with your very best friend.  Except we are now adults, working and living in an adult world.  Even my children know that I will not read a message that is not in proper Afrikaans or English.

Then, people please.  If your are on a group with many a person, it’s not necessary for every single person to say thank you or noted when a message has been sent.  Especially if that message was sent to give information.  No need to thank anyone.  You got the message.  Move on.  “There was an accident on the N12″  “thank you”  “thank you”  “thank you”  “thank you”  “thank you”  “thank you”  “noted” “thank you”  “noted”  “noted”   NO!  Please, it was just information.  If one person has said thank you, clearly the message has been delivered.  No reply needed.

I’ll get off my soapbox again, thankful that I indeed have a life where people want me on a group.  Must be darn bad if you check your phone and you have NO messages!


Traffic offences

Look, I’m not a perfect driver.  I never go over the speed limit.

I am thankful that I don’t live in a big city though.  I have a total of 3,3 km to drive from my house, drop the kids at school and to work.

Not a long way to go.  Still I get upset most mornings.  I even take the quieter roads, just to miss those who apparently got their licenses illegally.  I’m not just talking taxi-drivers though.  Actually not at all.  We all know they don’t obey the traffic rules.

I’m talking about those who think that stop streets are either not for them or only to be seen as yield sign.

People who has never learned to use their indicator.  Maybe the new cars don’t come out with one fitted or only once you have paid off your car you are allowed to get one?  I’m assuming since it’s normally those who don’t use them.

I wonder why the same people stop at red lights?  What’s the difference?  Or can’t they read?  Don’t understand “S.T.O.P.” but can understand a red light?

Who knows but thank goodness I don’t live in a big city.  It would not be good for my blood pressure.

Not saying these drivers are bad people, since mostly obviously they are not.  It’s just my pet peeve I suppose.

So if you see me like this, sorry.  Maybe just stop or use your indicator and I will smile and wave.

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Three sons and one daughter

I have three sons and one daughter and every time I see something like this, my blood boils.

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“I’m not allowed to date ever”

Or photos of a Dad standing with his gun as his daughter gets ready for her date.

How uninformed those parents are.  Trust me when I say that the boys aren’t always the problem.  Most often the girls want more than the boys are willing to give.  Especially when the boys are raised well.

Girls tend to break hearts just as easily as boys.

If it’s about sex or sexuality well then here is a wake-up call to dad’s of girls.  They are just as willing or wanting as boys.  When they are in younger grades, then more so.

Don’t threaten my son.  At all.  He has been raised to treat a girl / woman with the utmost respect.  I hope your daughter was raised to do the same.

Same with my daughter.  She will respect herself and men as long as they do the same.  Put down your gun and raise your child.  Teach her to stand up for herself and to choose a man that will protect her and not hurt her.


Long weekends

I love long weekends.  I love holidays.  I love that I get to spend more time with my kids, without the rush of school, sports, choir, meetings, clients, work …. well basically life.  Life tends to get in the way right?

I get to play cricket with them (even when I fall and feel 100 years old AND miss the catch)

I get to take silly selfies.

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We get to sleep late.  Go to bed late.  Watch movies.

We don’t go away as often as we used to.  Not near as often as I would like to.  Going places teaches them about life.

Staying home does that too though.  One can be at home.


Load shedding

Deep dark Africa

Some load shedding reactions in our home:

“Urg!!! I was in the middle of a game!!” (xbox)

Thanks to many previous dark moments, we have sufficient light but we all end up in the same room.
Everyone on their own devices, until:

“Aaahhhh my battery is flat!” See, this happens because they only charge the phones once they are completely flat.

Someone is bound to start singing, humming or whistling. This of course makes me grab my charged ipad and promptly the song gets downloaded. Lets face it. Once you start you continue. Like eet-sum-mor biscuits.

Once the lights are back on, we normally hear:

“Quick, please charge my phone!” “Yes! We have wi-fi!”

I am just thankful for the fan / air-conditioner and coffee.


Electricity

We were warned about two weeks ago that there would be no electricity in most of our town today. Which is kind of funny when I think of how our electricity is cut at odd times, without warning.

Anyway, plans were made for today but since my entire family is still asleep I don’t know if we will still follow through on that. See, no electricity means a white noise free home. Also no lights. No TV. With Jason’s room so dark, he and Tommie might sleep through today lol

Everyone jumped and fought over charging cables last night of course. Can’t date to go without charged electronics! #


10 Things

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1. My kids
(I never saw myself as being a mother when I was a child. I didn’t picture the perfect wedding and having blonde little children. I thought my career would define me. Well, it did not)

2. My husband
(We have had too many downs but recently more ups. I do love him. He makes me laugh when I don’t feel like ignoring him hehe)

3. My parents
(I could not do what I do and be I am without them. They are truly my closest friends)

4. My family (brothers, in-laws, nephews..)
(I am blessed. I have a family that cares. That will be there for us or my kids any time I need them)

5. My cellphone
(I know. A cellphone makes me happy. It does. It keeps me connected. I can take pretty good photos with it to keep memories alive.)

6. My iPad
(Another gadget but let’s face it. I have my books there, my internet friends, my google, my photos, my work, my mail. It is a part of me)

7. My animals
(I love my dogs. I always have. My dogs aren’t just dogs. They are family members. Bella is lying here next to me on the bed, snoring away. She makes me happy. So do all our dogs)

8. My camera
(It is important to me to capture memories. I look back at the photos that my parents took when I was little and I am so thankful that they did)

9. Friends
(I appreciate friendship. I appreciate that I can have different relationships with different friends)

10. Music
(Music is an emotion. I can change how I feel with music. It can put me back at a certain stage of my life by just hearing the first beats of a song. When I still ran, I used to love the time I had on the road and the music ears)


31 day challenge

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I have decided to take part in the 31 Day Blogging challenge. I have not done something like this in ages. Will be good to get me back to blogging more often again!

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Write the story of your life. So many chapters to condense into so few words.

Born 1974 in Pietersburg. The youngest of three kids. The only daughter. That would pretty much define my childhood. The one without the instant friend. The little one who tagged along.

We moved to Delareyville for 5 years and then to Klerksdorp. I have lived there most of my life.
I was lucky to never have to change schools. One primary school and one high school.

My brother had a very bad accident during my matric year. Since my folks had to pay back his bursary, I decided to study through UNISA. It was not easy. I will not lie. Working and studying accounting science is difficult, I clearly remember one night before I wrote my last accounting paper where I told my dad I would fail and that I was not going to write. He told me I could not write and get zero or try and get something. I wrote and got great marks (thanks Dad!)

I got married 14 days after writing my last exam. 14 November 1998.

Got my most important job on 4 May 2000. The day Quintus was born. The day I became a mother. I resigned from my job that same day. I worked my butt off until then. Long hours on the road. I would have been a photo on the wall. My job thought they owned me.
I started working with my dad in August 2000. One of my best decisions ever.

I have managed to be there for my kids like a full-time mom, while getting enough work done to cover a full day or more.

I have had very bad times. I have done stupid things. I have lots of regrets. I have always loved with my whole heart. I care about other people, even if I don’t know them. I give to those in need. I love animals. I am a good mom. Not perfect but good.

This is the story of me. Or the part I am willing to share in few words.


Good and bad

Yesterday I had an operation to fix something on my hand that I hurt when playing with our Labrador.

Clearly she is stronger than me.

Of course it would be my right hand and interesting to see the spelling mistakes i make now while swiping on the phone.  One of the choir member’s mom thought i was being very ruse lol

it also has its ups.  I was pulled over by a traffic cop.  I was doing my best to find my drivers licence and he felt sorry for me and let me go.  Not even picking up that I wasn’t wearing my seatbelt (I normally do but man what a pain with only one hand)

I have come to realize that out Labrador is stronger than me without a doubt lol


Bonsai tree

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A client gave me a six year old bonsai tree today. His baby. How sweet is that!!! I know nothing about bonsai trees though (even though I have always wanted one) Thank goodness for Google!! Michael says I probably only helped him a little bit, that its why a got a little tree LOL 😉 I still think it is pretty special that he is trusting me with his “baby”! Grow little one, grow! (Jason is calling him “blaartjie” lol)


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I have only one wish for my family and yours…

…To be happy


I love these life lessons

1. Life isn’t fair, but it’s still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Change the way you think.
4. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and family will. Stay in touch.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month..
6. You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It’s more healing than crying alone.
8. Release your children when they become adults, its their life now
9. Save for retirement starting with your first pay cheque.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won’t screw up the present.
12. It’s OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don’t compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn’t be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye.
16. Take a deep breath It calms the mind.
17. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.
18. Whatever doesn’t kill you really does make you stronger.
19. It’s never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don’t take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don’t save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Just because you believe you are right, doesn’t mean you are. Keep an open mind.
23. Be eccentric now. Don’t wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
26.. Frame every so-called disaster with these words ‘In five years, will this matter?’
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. Your job is to love your children, not choose who they should love.
35. Don’t audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
36. Growing old beats the alternative — dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood.
38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d grab ours back.
41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
42. The best is yet to come…
43.. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
44. Yield..
45. Life isn’t tied with a bow, but it’s still a gift."


Lack of respect

Something that really works on my nerves, is a child that blatantly ignores an adult. 

When I talk to a child, any child, I expect that child to look at me and acknowledge what I say.  If I ask them not to do something (that would be wrong by any standard of society), I expect them to listen.

Maybe it’s because I raise my kids like that.  Maybe it’s because I was raised that way.

Unfortunately I find that this is not the way things are anymore!

To give an example.  I have asked a child to get off from the rugby field (during a rugby match) and she completely looked me in the eye and kept on walking.

I’ve asked children to stop playing with sticks they kept putting into a fire and they would look me in the eye and continue.

I wondered if this was purely a “new generation” thing.  A lack of parental involvement in the kids’ lives.  That they just didn’t notice.

This however is not true.  Isn’t it said that children learn by example?

True.  So so true.

They see their parents skip a stop sign.

Park where they shouldn’t

Exceed the speed limit.

The one that stood out to me last week, was when parents were asked not to stand next to the rugby field while the kids where playing in the quarter-finals.  Over and over again they were asked to move away.  Most didn’t. 

That’s the example.  They stare into the eyes of those who asked.  Those who are applying the league rules and ignore them.

Can we expect differently from the children?

Probably not.


Haven’t been blogging

I haven’t been blogging much lately …. I miss it.  I miss being honest on my blog and not caring who reads it and who will judge me.  I miss not having to think if someone will feel offended if I write something, even if I don’t mean it that way. 

  • I have ear ache.  Again.  Before you start giving me a hard time about it, I HAVE made an appointment with the doctor.  For today actually!
  • I had a great birthday.  I realized how many people care about me and felt very much loved on my very special day.
  • The absolute highlight of my day was the song the boys sang to me.  Not just sang.  They wrote the song and lyrics all by themselves.  I am so touched by the thought and love they put into it.  The words are so adorable.  I’m so blessed to have these kids.
  • I’m extremely proud of Jason’s team that won the KOSH rugby league.  It’s a big thing and I hope it helps to lift his spirits.
  • I found out that he has been bullied at school.  I saw the headmaster yesterday and he spoke to both boys.  I hope it stops now.  I might how to do more than just talk to that child.
  • My heart is extremely sore for Quintus’s team that lost. They have had their best season so far but here’s to hoping next year will be even better.
  • I think I need to go onto happy pills or something. 
  • Maybe I just need more money.
  • Maybe I just need to leave the finances in my husband’s hands….open his eyes and such.
  • It’s cold.  Freezing.
  • I’ve come to realize that my kids are pretty darn well-behaved little guys. I’m not saying this because I’m their mom and feel I need the pat on the back.  They do.  I’m very proud of them.  I look at other kids and I’m shocked at their lack of respect for older people. 
  • I can’t wait for this weekend.  I have so much work that needs to be done by tomorrow…..

…. and here I am blogging, instead of doing that work!


Learn by example

You know what I don’t get?  Well many things but lets stick to this for now.

Kids who think they are better than others.  “I’m a better rugby player than you”  for instance.  Uhm okay.  You are so unsure of yourself that you need to go around saying something like that?  You need to say something like that to make others “like” you?  You THINK if you say that, someone will like you more?

I hope my kids doesn’t go around saying something like that.  The thing is, if you say that….”I’m better than YOU”, you aren’t just blowing your own horn.  You are belittling this person you are saying this too.

Maybe kids don’t have the social skills to understand this yet.  Their parents should though.  Kids learn by example isn’t it?

To the little boy who said that to Jason …. I hope in time you will learn to be more secure in yourself.


Wedding bells

So Kate and Will gets married today.  (we almost say that as though they are personal friends, don’t we?)

Congratulations to them and I do hope their marriage lasts and they will be happy and make pretty babies.

Why are people SO passionate about it all though.  Sjoe.  Either they are completely nauseated and won’t even watch TV today, just in case they get a glimpse of the beautiful bride.

Or the sommer take off from work to watch the whole thing.

Both pretty extreme I’d say.

I wouldn’t mind watching.  I’d like to see what her dress looks like.  Just like I normally look when I see a “Just married” car come past.  Curiosity en so.  I won’t make popcorn and spend the day in front of the TV though.  Twitter will inform me when she is ready to walk down the isle and I’ll dash off to have a peak.

But each to their own.

Congratulations to the two (and wouldn’t it be soooo funny really bad if she turned around and did the run-away bride thing?  What would happen then lol)


Post

  • My post box is locked because I forgot to didn’t pay the renewal.
  • My credit card expired and I’m broke without it.
  • A new credit card was sent to my post box.

See the problem there?

  • I go to the mall (which I hate) to get to the Post Office (that I hate even more)
  • Pay my account and get them to open my post box.
  • No post.
  • None.
  • Go to the depot (apparently it would be there)
  • No post there either.
  • It was posted to my home address.

This should work out fine then right?

  • The home address they have on record is not mine.
  • I have never lived there.
  • The owners of that house got rid of the post … don’t blame them.

See the problem?

  • I’m not still broke.
  • It’s going to take a week before I can get new cards.
  • So happy ….. not.

Oh and my Outlook won’t work.  I’ve been away for two weeks……

Maybe my internet mail also decided to lock off and forward all mail into the unknown world wide web.


Let’s support this

This is not about Pick ‘n Pay or promoting them (well indirectly it is) but it’s about saving the lives of babies.  Babies that are currently dying because we don’t have enough incubators to keep them alive.

Till the end of February, Pick ‘n Pay is running a campaign where you can purchase a R10 donation ticket.  There are some prizes that goes with that but I don’t think one should look at what you could win.  Just what babies could gain from your R10.

Read about it here and please support it.

(No, I don’t personally gain from this.  But I do think it’s a worthwhile cause)


My Monday that was

Monday sucked. 

I would get depressed all over again if I had to go through it all.

About 10 % of my irritation / anxiety / stress yesterday was explained by this that went around on Facebook this morning.

Do i work? Uh yeah i do work… 24 hours a day….why??? Coz I’m a MOM… I am a cook, a cleaner, a parent, a teacher, a referee, a nanny, a nurse, a handyman, a maid, a photographer, a councelor, a chauffer and a comforter… I don’t get holidays, sick pay or any days off…. I work through the DAY and NIGHT…. Am on call 24 hours!!! Now tell me your job is harder than mine….

This is just the mom part of my life.  Of every working mother’s life. 

Just like the father, I have a full-time job too.

Yet, I don’t get to come home before my wife and then sulk because there’s no food on the table.  Sit back and watch her cover books and look for a zillion little pictures in magazines that till today I don’t get the point of.

I don’t get to not worry about stationary, plastic covers, where the sellotape is.

But like I said.  That was just 10 % of my frustration.


Culture!? I don’t respect her culture!?

I’m SSSOooooooo ticked off right now. 

My housekeeper was due back from leave today.  Since she left her set of keys here, I had to wait for her before I could leave for work.  She didn’t pitch.

I sms’ed.  No reply.  I phoned.  Her phone is off.  I phoned many times during the day.  Phone off.

I phoned tonight at 6:30 pm and her boy friend answers.  Apparently she’ll be back at 7:30 pm.  I asked him if he knows why she didn’t come to work today and he said, she didn’t say.

So I phone her at 7:30 pm.  Apparently, I didn’t give her an exact date when to be back at work.  This after we agreed she’d be back after New Year.

Apparently she is having some or other traditional culture thing because she’s pregnant.  I have never heard about this one before.

I told her that she has to be back tomorrow, with a sick note for today or she’ll be fired (she already has a warning for not coming to work)

She said that she can only come home on Monday and I’m not respecting her culture.    That I should get someone else to work this week, she’ll be back Monday.

When I told her again, that if she plans on coming back on Monday, she can just as well not come back at all.  She’ll be fired.

haha…immediately drops the “madam” and calls me by my name.  Thought that was so funny.  Again, she went off on how I don’t respect her culture.  That I must respect her culture.

I told her that she is not respecting mine.  In my culture (Christian) when we make a promise, we keep it.  She’s not keeping hers and thus not respecting my culture.

Again and again, the whole “you don’t respect my culture…..I have the right not to come to work when it comes to my culture …. blah blah blah”

I asked her why she didn’t just phone me ahead of time and ask if it’s okay that she doesn’t come back this week and she had no reply.

Well, FIRED she is. 

I’ll probably get a letter from CCMA but I’m ready for them!


Marry the rich guy

This morning, as I was driving back from dropping the boys off at school, an old school friend of mine drove past me.  In a sleek sexy brand-new Mercedez.  Even though my bakkie is higher, she still seemed to tower out above me.

It’s not even as though she worked to earn that car … she married to earn that car.  I thought of how I used to sit hours and teach her accounting.  How she really battled at school (even with boyfriends) and yet, she ended up marrying the rich guy.

For a second there, I thought that Marriage 101 should be taught in school.  How to catch the rich guy and such.  Sommer having a small pity party.  (I always wish I didn’t have to work, this time of the year)

I then thought of how I see her and her husband at school.  They don’t look happy.  Maybe it’s just their way … not to show affection but they don’t look happy.

I am happy though.  I work hard, mostly wish I could be a stay-at-home-mom but I’m happy.  I’d love to have less stress and more time with the children.  I think they would be happier and less stressed but we are happy.  We enjoy each other and feel loved.  Things work for us.

So yes, I’d love the smart car and no work but I prefer the happy we have.


Uhmmmm….no thanks

This is an e-mail I received over the weekend.  (I know there’s many of these types of e-mails and the sad thing is that some people even fall for it.)

But uhmmm British soldier, Gen Sir David Richards…no thanks.

Hello,

I am a British soldier currently in Afghanistan. I am with the 40th Regiment Royal Artillery in Afghanistan. We hijacked a suspected Van painted black between the border of Pakistan and Afghanistan. The Door gunners sitting behind machine guns in the Black Van tried shooting at our direction but we lunched a combat backup attack on the Black Van none of the Taliban survived the attack.

We discovered other currencies including US dollars of about $ 16 million loaded inside the Black Van with so many types of machine guns. We want to move this money out of this place, before we declare other items in the van to the international press. This place is a war zone you will keep our share pending the end of our assignment here in Afghanistan.
We will take 60%. You take 40%. No strings attached, just help us move it out of Afghanistan, Afghanistan is a war zone. We plan to use secured logistics courier to ship the money out in a large box.

If you can help to receive the box for us, I will send you the full details. Kindly send me an e-mail signifying your interest including your most confidential telephone/fax numbers for quick communication also your contact details. This should be a secret and must be a secret between us.

Respectfully,
Gen Sir David Richards (right).


Rough week

I’m so glad it’s weekend.  It’s been a tough week…actually starting last Saturday with me having to take Jason to ER due to a bad ear infection. 

I worked all of Sunday, since there was a big dead-line looming.  As with any deadline – there’s loads of added stress.

Monday I had a small fall-out with my father-in-law, that ended with him shouting at me.  I don’t like people shouting at me.  He apologised to Tommie the next day but not to me.  Since he shouted at me, I expected him to apologise to me.  Anyway ….

Then Quintus got sick.  He didn’t want to go to school but is writing tests and I felt he needed to be there.  Getting him up and ready, was no fun.

Every morning this week, we ended up doing some or other school project that was only remembered at 6:30 am.

Zander got sick…as in high fever sick.  Not lekker at all.  He is still sick.  Now I have three children on antibiotics.  At least one of the three is feeling better now.

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Work was hectic and still is hectic and will be until December some time.  I should be used to it by now but it seems to hit me unexpectedly every tax season.

Last night Quintus and I stayed up late to study and we were up early this morning again.  I think he must be so tired.  I hope he doesn’t go to bed too late tonight.  (He is sleeping over at a friend, since they went to a church thing together tonight)

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Tomorrow Jason has his first cricket match of the season (did I mention I’m cricket coach as well!?)  I’m hoping that it will be fun and I am so thankful to have my dad help out as well. 


5 Things

5 things that scare me

  1. Losing my children
  2. Going to jail (have no idea why I think I’ll ever end up there lol)
  3. The thought of losing my parents
  4. Enclosed spaces – Claustrophobia for me
  5. Being attacked in my very own home

5 things I love

  1. My husband,  children and our pets
  2. My black berry and laptop
  3. The love my boys have for each other
  4. Reading the “I love my mom” messages the boys leave all over the house
  5. Seeing my children smile

5 things I hate

  1. Disappointing myself
  2. Disappointing others
  3. When some judges another
  4. Abuse – any kind towards anything
  5. Bad driving

5 things I wish for

  1. To live until I’m 113  (ha!)
  2. My children to be happy
  3. Enough money, not to have to worry about buying the simple things for my children
  4. Peace in my country
  5. I wish I could leave near the sea or mountains.  Mine dumps just don’t do it for me

5 things – 1 thing you might now know about each of us

  1. Tommie grew up on a farm and went to an agricultural high school
  2. I never wanted to be an accountant
  3. Quintus is having a tough time at school at the moment but hiding it well
  4. Jason is very different, much more confident between his friends, than at home
  5. Zander has amazing ball sense