My husband is 38.  Yet he still follow orders from his parents like he is 8.

Remember when we were kids?  “Please go fetch us this”  “Take the dog out for a walk”  “Pick up your toys”.  Our parents ordered asked us to do many things.  As children we listened and did what was asked of us.  This is the way it works.

Then as we get older, grow up, become adults and get married, this changes.  We have our own lives.  Our own many orders that we need to follow from your wife due to our lives in general.  Our parents don’t expect us to follow orders anymore.  They will ask but not order.  The balance changes and this is a good thing.  We need to take care of our family’s needs.  Mostly we will do what our parents ask anyway but now we have to take into account our own family and our own needs as well. 

Or that is how I see it.

In Tommie’s situation, this hasn’t changed.  He is still 8.  They still order.  They snap their fingers and regardless of our needs, he will jump for them.  I know he means well.  I don’t doubt that.  However he is a grown man and choose to get married and have children.  Now we should be his priority.

Yesterday we had to rush home from the wedding.  I was feeling horrible.  I got the boys’ stomach virus and really needed his help.  I needed him home to help with our three boys.  I needed him home for some TLC for my own self.  However, he had told his parents he would take their caravan for them.  200 km from our home.  He had to sleep over there last night, leaving me alone with the boys all this time.  My father-in-law is coming through to town on Tuesday, he could pick up the caravan then.  Tommie could have taken the caravan today, when I probably would have felt better.

Again he chose to ignore my our needs.